Being up in Idaho, I felt like I was able to completely free myself from anything that was emotionally holding me back. I have the best of friends up there who pushed me to become the best person I could be. I have really seen myself change in amazing ways. I was able to study and I did not ever expect myself to say this...
CAN I JUST GO BACK TO SCHOOL ALREADY?!
For Starters..
These 3 weeks that I have been home have been far from easy. Despite the fact that I've been with my wonderful family, it has still been pretty difficult.
I can not help but continuously remind myself of the memories that I had before I left to college. Even though there are some memories that I would much rather forget, I still helplessly remember the good ones that completely captivated me with one boy.
"I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future, we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love."
I know things have changed, and life treats everyone differently. I do, however, believe that we meet people because we are supposed to meet them. There is some reason as to why they found their way into our lives. There is no way that I could be in the place that I am now without the experiences I have been blessed to go through or without the people I have come in contact with.
I used to believe that things would always be easy. Dumb, right? That after all is said and done, we can progress with our lives and live happily ever after.
We all know that's not the case.
It's been so long since I left for college, and I still catch myself thinking of old embedded memories that made me so happy. Yes, there were always negatives, too, but choosing to forget is what allowed me to just look at the good memories that made me a better person.
I do not regret a single thing. I learned so much. To be grateful to have met him would be an understatement. Others think i'm crazy for still feeling this way, but they never knew him the way I did. I'm not ashamed to admit it. I would never lie about it, either.
No matter how difficult any situation gets, I know that life has a beautiful way of making it better.
I know there is a reason that everything in my life has played out the way it has. School will come again in 5 months, and that's the time I am meant to return. No matter how hard it is being home, I am grateful because I am constantly learning and growing. Things will get better. God has a plan. I am beyond blessed for what I have gone through and for the people I have met, including that boy. I embrace difficult times and hard challenges because they have only made me a stronger person.
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